Scene opens with two main characters, a boy and a girl, standing on the stage.  They don’t seem to notice each other, and are speaking directly to the audience. Girl is holding a coffee cup, looking like she’s on her way to work/school, Boy is slightly agitated.  There’s a stool/chair center stage.

Girl/Boy: My name…is Taylor.

(pause)  I hate it.

Boy: Yeah, yeah, I know what you’re thinking.

Girl: What’s wrong with the name Taylor?

Boy: Well…it’s just…

Girl: The thing is…

Boy: It’s a girl’s name. (simultaneously)

Girl: It’s a boy’s name. (simultaneously)

Girl: I mean, TAYLOR.  There are so many other names!  So many great names, “T” names, if that’s what makes you happy.  Just think about it.  Tabby, Trisha, Tina, Tory…

Boy: …Tyler, Tim, Travis, Tom…

Girl: …Tara, Tally, Tiffany, Tasha…

Boy: …Trevor, Ted, Todd, Terry…

Girl: You get the picture.

Boy: They should have just named me “Mildred” for Christ sake.  At least then I’d have a legitimate reason to be annoyed.

Girl: My mom just doesn’t understand. (in high pitched voice) “There are lots of girls named Taylor!” she’ll say.

Boy: (in high pitched voice)  “Wonderful, handsome, famous men named Taylor!” she’ll say.

Girl/Boy:  (rolls eyes) Yeah. Right.

Boy: When I think of Taylor, I think of a pretty girl, with a great body, lying on a beach in a bikini somewhere.

Girl: I think of a cute boy, with nice eyes, making me a cappuccino.

(pause, then sigh)

Boy/Girl: It’s just so frustrating!

(Girl starts to walk center stage while talking, sits in chair)

Girl: I mean, just the other day, I was at Starbucks, just sitting there, and this really cute guys walks up to me.

(Boy starts to walk center stage while talking)

Boy: I was in Starbucks the other day, and I saw this hot girl just sitting there, drinking her coffee or something.

Girl: And I sort of smile at him.

Boy: She totally digs me, I can tell.

Girl: So I say (turns and talks directly to Boy, flirtatious) “Hey, what’s up?”

Boy: And I’m all like (turns and talks directly to Girl, awkward) “Um…not much…um…I was just wondering if you’d like to…get a coffee or something. (notices she has a coffee, speeds up)  I mean, not if you already have one or anything, we could go somewhere or…something…

(beat)

Girl: (looks back at audience) It was sort of adorable.  So I turn to him and say “Sure, that sounds nice…hey, you seem familiar.  Do I know you?  What’s your name?”

Boy: And I ask her “What’s your name?”

Girl/Boy: And I say

(beat)

“…Taylor.”

(beat, surprised at first, then look away from each other, awkward)

Boy: And then she says

Girl: (looking at him) “Oh, I think I actually had some plans with friends this afternoon.” (looks back at audience) And he says

Boy: “Yeah, I think I have a paper to write…”

Boy/Girl: “See you around then?”

(beat, looks back at audience)

Yeah. Right.

Girl: I am so sick of this stupid name causing me problems.

Boy: It’s like everywhere I go, somehow-

Girl: Someway-

Boy/Girl: Taylor gets in the way.

Boy: So…I’m thinking of changing my name, you know?

Girl: A new name, a fresh start, right?

Boy: I want a name that sort of…shows who I am

Girl: Something gentle…

Boy: Something kind…

Girl: Something friendly…

Boy: That inspires confidence…

Girl: A name that will really let me be me

Boy: And something that doesn’t make me seem like a complete idiot.

(pause, as they both consider)

Boy/Girl: How about…Sam?

(black out)